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I honestly don’t know what happens to me, I sound as though all of my words have been fed through Google Translate.

I have a question for you and I am hoping very much that you will be able to help me.” This is how I speak when I’m on one of those live chat things.

And sometimes it’s as though you’re having a chat with yourself, because you end up saying the same thing about twelve times and the other person doesn’t get what you’re on about. Anyway, back to work – Luna G on the live chat is waiting for me to answer the latest technical question that I have no hope of understanding…

It’s probably my fault because I don’t know the correct terminology for anything.

A good selection of bots gets you info you can use as well as entertainment.“You’d have thought they would want something wipe clean,” she said to me when she reported back. Nevertheless, I adopt the superior tone of a Brit abroad in the 1980s and slow my typing r-i-g-h-t d-o-w-n so that I make myself a-b-s-o-l-u-t-e-l-y c-l-e-a-r. But then terrible things (technology-wise) have been happening – things I can’t pretend to even remotely understand. And it all seems to be having a knock on effect on the rest of my life, because the fan in my car has started making a noise like a Boing 747 taking off and Siri keeps calling people on my i Phone without me even touching the bloody thing. ” You know when you have that one name in your phone book that would be the worst possible name to pocket dial?I don’t think anyone’s supposed to ) but I have been spending inordinate amounts of time on live chat website helpdesks with various internet server providers and domain hosts. I used to think tinkering with website code was hard but anything to do with app development just blows my mind. I can write a dissertation in a day by stitching together (figuratively speaking) eight hundred and thirty post-it notes and I can just about make it through a fairly advanced science lecture about new and jazzy skincare ingredients, but when it comes to servers and content management systems and modules and nodules I have absolutely no clue. The person that you should have deleted many years ago? ” “Cancelling Pete The Trampoline Davies.” I have no idea where this post is going – it was only supposed to be an apology for yesterday’s newsletter, in which the entire blog post was mangled and tiny copy was interspersed with huge images that were aligned left, centre, to the right, as though they’d been pasted in by a scrapbooking lunatic. I’m really sorry if you attempted to read it on your i Phone, it was truly horrendous.You may have the latest and greatest i Phone XS Max, but what good is it without awesome i OS apps? Even if you don't have Apple's new top-of-the-line device, a major reason for owning an i Phone is the wealth of apps available for the platform. If 100 apps are too many for your attention span, check out our much shorter and sweeter 12 must-have i Phone apps. The apps included here will run just fine on the past few generations of i Phones, large or small.However, if you have an i Phone X or later, some apps let you do new, different things.

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